Happy Valentine’s & Happy Galantine’s Day to all, but before you say I LOVE YOU, make sure you first say I LOVE ME!
If you are wondering what “Galentine’s Day” means, it’s celebrated tomorrow on Feb 13th with friends and is the same concept as “Friendsgiving”.
If you are following me, you have already told yourself you are worthy of love because you are taking a few minutes each week to read and reflect and gifting yourself a few minutes of “Me” time. When you love yourself, the rest becomes secondary. Over the years, I have noticed that most of us are better at giving love than receiving love. Think about when a friend offers to pick up the tab for a dinner, our automatic response is to resist. However, nothing makes me happier than buying someone else lunch or dinner. I used to think you have to give love to receive love, but openly receiving love shows that you value yourself which is the basis of having a healthy relationship with another person.
When we don’t feel worthy of love, we subconsciously sabotage relationships by forcing the outcome we fear most. If we are worried that our partner will leave, we become needy and clingy which ultimately will push the other person to leave.
For parents: This also applies to relationships with our children. When we are busy and fulfilled in our own lives, we can enjoy our children for who they are without being attached to their outcomes. Our children appreciate when we are happy because it elevates the mood of the entire family. As children age and relationships become part of their lives, we as parents must role model self-love by doing things that make us happy. I loved when my children were younger and we baked cookies and cupcakes together. This is still a favorite memory.
If Valentine’s Day brings up lack and frustration. Take a moment to answer these 5 questions:
1. I am unique because:
2. My strengths are:
3. I give of myself, and I am kind to:
4. These people are important in my life:
5. Words that make me happy are:
If you are struggling with any of these categories, I am here to help you. The more you love yourself the less you need from others. The next step is to combine your strengths and the words that make you happy into a list and see how often this list is part of your life. The more often these words show up, the more aligned you will feel to your authentic self. If words that make you happy are just words and not part of your life, then it’s time for a Do Over.
“Ocean” is a word that makes me happy. If I am not able to be near an ocean which is most of the time, I google ocean pictures and I will listen to ocean sounds on my phone while I am working. I also love to travel so I search images of countries that I would love to visit, and it satisfies me until I can one day go there. It’s amazing what you can find if you know what you are looking for. If this “loving me” exercise seems confusing or daunting, I am here to help you curate your list and develop a plan to live more authentically and to claim yourself as worthy of love.
Last week I was in a workshop and one of the members was sharing something that made her feel vulnerable. As we walked out of the class, I asked her if I could give her a hug. She was blown away and I saw her face change after I hugged her. This hug also elevated my mood tremendously. Months ago, I would never have done this, but I feel I am so fueled up and have extra love energy to pass around. If you need a Do Over to find your abundant energy, I am here to help you.
Whether you are celebrating Valentine’s or Galentine’s Day or celebrating yourself by binge watching TV (my favorite past time), I am sending you all a huge hug.
~Andi
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