A yogi friend came to our weekly Friday yoga zoom class sad because she had just lost a bracelet on the beach. She was upset because this bracelet was recently purchased as a gift of love to herself for her past birthday. She asked our group to send out a prayer to bring the bracelet back to her.
I told her that in my experience, things come to us when we are not looking for them. I thought it was fantastic that she bought herself a love gift, but I told her that perhaps she is meant to dig deeper and find true love in herself and not need the bracelet as a reminder. Taking the path to finding self-love is very hard work. It takes bravery, patience, and acceptance to peel off our outer layers and look at ourselves in the raw.
My friend went back to the beach after yoga as she lives nearby. I told her to keep her eyes open not only for the bracelet, but also for a person on the beach that maybe she is supposed to meet but would not have encountered if not for the lost bracelet. As it turned out, 3 men helped her look for her bracelet. After coming up empty handed, she invited them back to her house for an impromptu thank you BBQ dinner. Later that evening feeling happy, relaxed, and accepting the loss of her bracelet, she went to rinse out her bathing suit top that was crumpled in the sink… and the bracelet fell out onto the counter. I got shivers when she shared the update with me yesterday morning. I felt so elated for her that it carried over into my day. It was validation that when we genuinely feel grateful and good about ourselves, we attract good things. Story update: One of the guys left his sunglasses at her place after dinner. Hmmm…. wonder if this is why she lost her bracelet ?
It requires a lot of patience when things feel bleak. There are times that I don’t understand why things happen, and then months later, it all makes sense. In these frustrating situations, I say to myself, “I don’t know why this is happening right now, but I will in the future”. This allows me to stay calm and be in acceptance rather than becoming irritable. Occasionally I still catch myself in a whirlpool of frustration and insecurity, but once I recognize this is happening, I take a quick Do Over by digging inside myself to identify my trigger. This allows me to observe the situation from the outside which is never as painful as experiencing it from within.
For parents: Many children get attached to that one toy, stuffed animal, or “blankey”. This is a wonderful sense of security for them but be ready to have the exact replica for back up when they lose this item. (Hint: wash it often and rub it on the original to get it as soft and smelling the same as the original.) As children get older, teach them that their happiness is not tied to buying a new toy or anything materialistic. If your child needs this to feel secure, dig deeper with them. Show your children that EVERYONE has insecurities and doubts. When I am in the mindset of self-doubt, I have fun googling a famous person’s name and add the word “insecurity”. You will be amazed at the articles that pop up. I just tried it with Beyonce and Adam Sandler, but I have done this many times before.
Things of sentimental value are wonderful and should be treasured. However, if losing an item causes us to derail beyond a few hours of disappointment, then there is more work to be done in this area. If you find you are always searching for your version of the “bracelet”, I can help you take a Do Over where we will work together to change your mindset so that “jewels” will naturally start flowing to you.
~Andi
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